well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
He kissed a someone with a penis
i just woke up naked on my porch, holding the neighbors cat in my arms.
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
Randomize
