Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
Realized I'm still to drunk to comprehend work emails. Marked them all as unread. Here's to responsible hang overs.
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Randomize
