Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(250): View more from British Columbia

i'm returning your mother's day gift to finance my alcoholism over the next week.

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(614): View more from Ohio

Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.

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(828): View more from North Carolina

if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.

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(931): View more from Tennessee

there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.

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(713): View more from Texas

I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer

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(201): View more from New Jersey

Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.

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(+33): View more from France

Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee

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(817): View more from Texas

So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?

(806): View more from Texas

Yes.

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(404): View more from Georgia

In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.

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