addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
I wish you could order shots online.
He said he wanted to have kids with me so they could grow up to be professional linebackers. Not. A. Complient.
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
Randomize
