My brain says no but my pants say off.
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
They never prepare you for how broke ur gonna be in college. I just accepted money from two underage girls at a gas station to buy them beer only because I'm trying to figure out a way to run off with it without them noticing.
Dude, use it to buy them beer. Then run the beer to ur car as fast as you can and bring it to the party. Seriously, we're running out of booze over here
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
Simultaneously sexting while making brunch plans. Multitasking at its gayest.
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Randomize