when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
I'm actually glad the whole thing's over now. It's exhausting to fake a pregnancy.
Imagine not having to fake it.
Yeah, I should never have kids, probably.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
Randomize