i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
Turned the water balloon filler into a jungle juice fire extinguisher. Please call me tomorrow afternoon and make sure that i'm still alive.
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
Randomize
