just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
I think I have vodka in my lungs
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
Last time i carry you out of a forest
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
Randomize
