I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
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