Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
At least I wasn't still dressed as a bottle of dom perignon when they took me to the ER
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
Randomize
