question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
please don't call me when you're wasted. i don't feel like having any other future arguments at 3:18am about how to hang up your phone. you have a flip phone, you should know regardless of how fucked up you are.
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
Is it weird I can only picture you in my heels naked?
Be proud; I'm a versatile boyfriend
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