Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
I tried to find an emoji but none convey my excitement for receiving good sex soon
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
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