i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
This is the difference between me and him; he buys you flowers, I buy you a dildo
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Randomize
