So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
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