she was so not down for the gang bang
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
Randomize
