I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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