His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
Randomize
