I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
I woke up to a shattered My Little Pony garbage pail, a black eye I don't know how I got and no one will look me in the face. Fuck tequila.
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
Randomize