it was like his penis was on wheels.
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
Yeah.. I'm sorry I broke your phone. But in my defense you handed me the frying pan.
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
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