Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
my mom just texted me to let me know that Hooters is hiring
i wish my mom had big dreams like that for me
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
Randomize
