Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
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