Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
Found an elderly homeless guy with a Gandalf beard passed out on my porch. I put a Santa hat over his erect dick cause he was naked.
Randomize
