8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
Fuck this. I'm adopting 12 cats and naming them after the 12 disciples. Maybe Jesus will have sympathy for me then.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
