she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
I'm high and craving hash browns from McDonalds. Please pick me up. I also would like a hug and a supportive pat on the back when you get here. Thanks.
Its two in the afternoon. McDonalds don't sell hash browns at 2 in the afternoon. Whore. The hug I can provide however.
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
Randomize
