i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
Randomize
