and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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