I'm going to jail i love you
your room smells of hookers.
And success
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
So here's a tip: don't give a blowjob the same morning you're going to the dentist. Cuz they will think you have "mouth trauma."
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
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