wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
You looked cold, so i decided to make you a blanket out of sticky notes.
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
Randomize