Surefire way to sober up: discover that your car is being towed at 2 am.
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
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