i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
I refuse to go to this wedding alone, or sober. Practice drunk-walking in heels and a Bridesmaid dress begins tonight.
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
I just woke up on my neighbors floor with my boots on, but no pants. I have 3 separate taco bell receipts in my pocket.
We've been together for 10 months. These next 2 may be a deal breaker. He has not met the summertime version of me that is so hungover today that I cancelled a meeting with my boss right after she sent me an appreciation note saying I have great work ethic. I have her fooled.
Randomize