left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
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