Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
she told me i tasted like america
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
You need to go! It’s a midwestern wedding - the single girls out there think life ends at 25 if they don’t have a picket fence and family. That’s when your penis introduces himself
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