1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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