Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
I wish I could donate my sober boners to my whiskey dick
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
WHY DID YOU INVITE ALEX?!?
Because she offered to bring a keg.
And also because you fucked her in an alley last week and I'm trying to be a good friend.
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
Randomize