Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
im watching shaqs comedy special. this is how i know im not sober.
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
How do you tell an ex that banging less hot chicks than me is highly insulting? I almost want to try and get him laid with a pretty girl just to save some face for dating him so long.
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
Randomize
