I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
Randomize
