I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Randomize
