I just saw a pregnant woman with a cigarette and a beer walking into the Larry the Cable Guy show. I'm glad my taxes are paying her medical expenses.
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
I had a dream that chipotle was out of burritos... Was more like a nightmare.. Gotta go make sure it wasn't real now
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
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