He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
He better not be in your backpack
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
Flight got cancelled. Stayed in the same hotel as the flight crew so now I can cross Sex with Pilot off the bucket list
He regularly flies into DC, so I’m going to sign him up for my Frequent Flyer program!
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
Randomize
