you fell asleep during kickboxing this morning
how does that even happen??
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
We're using joints as your birthday candles
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
I still have a little drunk in my system
Terrible idea I love it
Randomize
