The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
Randomize
