What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
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