I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
My early Valentine's Day one night stand just took an uber home. Thank you, technology, for letting me enjoy this day in peace. 😍
If its not for food we ain't going out.
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
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