Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
Jelly. This is your "are you still alive" text. Any response will do.
Hey I found a cat!
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
Just woke up to the cat unconscious on my stomach, his face between my tits, purring to bring down the walls. I'm endeared and horrified at the same time.
Randomize
