She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
Randomize
