She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
You came in as I got off work, ordered us jack and cokes. Put them on my tab, and then proceeded to fall asleep on the bar.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
Randomize