end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize
