Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
I think God is sending me all these 20 year olds to make up for wasting my 20's in that crappy ass marriage. Thanks Big Guy!
My liver is preforming stress tests.
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
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