about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
Randomize
