When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
Just saw a man being put through a dui test on the side of the road... it was noon and he was on a bicycle. God bless texas.
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
I just woke up in bed, rolled over, and found a whole pizza.
this is the second day in a row.
Oh. Yeah. It's the same pizza then.
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating?
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
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