Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
Randomize
