i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
My epitaph should read "Margaritas: she never learned"
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
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